May all our families be Holy Families
So often we try to compare our families to our neighbors or friends. “I wish my marriage was as happy as theirs. I wish my children got along as well as theirs. I wish our family was as strong as theirs.” We err in doing this because every family is a unique relationship of singular individuals. It is impossible for two families to be identical and every family has challenges which usually are not apparent to the eye of our neighbors.
Today, we celebrate the Feast of the Holy Family. We are tempted to look at the Holy Family as an ideal we can not realize in our families. But, Jesus, Mary and Joseph had their share of struggles. The trust which is fundamental to a marriage was challenged by the pregnancy. Joseph must have felt terrible when he had to bring his wife to a stable to have the child. Living in a foreign land, Egypt, away from family and traditions, was far from ideal. Still, the Holy Family made it through the difficulties of their family life for one reason only: they had great faith. Joseph had faith in the angel of his dreams and treated the pregnant Mary in an honorable way. He had faith that God would help him protect the child, and he moved the family to Egypt. Mary had faith both in the angel and in God’s working through Joseph. Jesus, having emptied himself of his divinity, had faith in his parents to care for him. The child Jesus didn’t need to perform miracles. He had all the miracles he needed in parents who cared for him.
The Holy Family conquered their struggles through their faith-life. This must also be the primary concern of our families. It does no good to long for that which is not probable. Instead, we as parent, whether it be one or two in the home, should focus on establishing a strong Christian home. And we parents wish we had the financial resources to be able to provide so much more for our children. What children need is a Christian home full of love, not the things.
The readings for this Sunday present some aspects of a Christian home. The first reading from Sirach says that children need to respect their parents. At first it refers to young children as it notes that mothers and fathers have their authority from God. Then it refers to older children when it says that children should take care of their parents when they age. Our children learn respect for us parents from the respect they see us giving each other and the respect we have for their grandparents. I believe that the way you treat your parents will be the way your children will treat you. If you treat your parents with respect and love, and your kindness to them is evident, your children will have learned this aspect of Christianity and will treat you the same way as your years mount.
The second reading deals with the interrelationships of the family. Paul tells the Colossians and us to deal with each other out of kindness, to be patient with each other, to forgive each other continually, not to let out pride determine what we say and do to each other. “Whatever you do, whether in speech or in action, do it in the name of the Lord.” The heart of this reading from Paul is that husbands and wives must respect each other. This same line of thought continues with children being told to respect their parents, and parents being told not to nag, nor continually find fault, with their children. (Confessional not a Court room)
May God bless all parents who never let anything diminish their respect for their children. And God bless children who receive and return their parents’ love. That is what Colossians; the second reading is all about.
Today’s Gospel is acted out almost every Sunday here at Holy Trinity. Mary and Joseph went to the temple holding Jesus. Simeon and Anna made a fuss. This happens here also. Just about every month one of our couples comes in to the church holding their newborn child. There joy is indescribable. “Look who we have with us,” they say without ever opening their mouths. It’s always a surprise even though I may have seen the expectant Mom every week. I love seeing the babies, and making a fuss. And I love seeing the huge change in the parents who present their first child. A young couple told me something that I know we have all realized when we came home from the hospital with that first child. They said, “You know, we can’t come and go and do the things we did before we had the baby, but we have so much more now. Life was great before, but much better now.”
I love seeing how much you love your children. I love the fact that you all are determined to provide the best for your children. Let me remind you, to be the best parents you can be, remain grounded in the Lord. Make prayer a part of your home life. Pray with your children at bedtime and pray for them after they fall asleep. Teach your children respect. Let them witness your respect for them, for each other, and for others and demand that they respect others, including you.
Do your best, and trust God to do the rest.
May all our families be Holy Families.